Sunday, September 28, 2008

A letter found in my house. Mistakes have been left in for the enjoyment of most.

My dearest Anne,

What's your story? Would you like to know what mine is? Well.. all tell you: I was born October 28 12th 1980, as you know, I loved you so much my dear until that horrible accsidint happed. I write this letter with love for you, and olny you. I must tell you I never loved Jane Groley or her step mother, I have always loved Loved you. I can't regert what happend it was my failt it happed, from Wedding was destrod because of me. As soon as I was cappshed by the XXXXX I was taken to Cappender, Loden, for triel was I write you a letter in peace. I hope you inderstand what happend and that you arn't are Cross, now what I will tell you what happend I am staling here St. Louies, Musseri. And I can never stop thinking what I did was ron I hope you know that. I will have Canl tell you so, if you wish.

You're loving,

I bow at your feet,

John A. Alumm
Septber, 1922

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Without A Title-The Story of Them

Written by R. L. Bertilson, L.C. Something Holmes and L.N. Taylor

It was a dark, misty night. The roses had already closed up. Might I add that it was bedtime for young Theresa Von Burglareo? She shivered. "ACK! IT'S AN EVIL DINO! It's going to crunch me!" Her parent's stepped in just in time, saving their daughter from being crunched by a mutant dinosaur.

Just then, a mutant tarantula that she thought she'd crushed crawled up her neck."Ahh, that tickles, Timmy. Why are you doing that?" Timmy affectionately crawled though her hair. "Hee hee,"she cried.

Just then, Frederico, her pet python snake crawled up her neck. "Not so tight, Frederico...You know, it worries my parents," She softly chided him. Her parents saw and conquered. They sent Theresa Von Burglareo to the asylum.

"Poor dear," thought Timmy. Federico was thinking the same thing. But Federico and Timmy d each other, so they never talked. Timmy felt so bad, however, that he chose to talk to Frederico.

After they talked, Frederico and Timmy thought up a plan to save Theresa Von Burglareo. "We could always get the help of Bobby." Bobby was a worm. All he ever did was sit and read and gain knowledge.

Bobby was busy eating an Apple, and after searching the yard for hours, they found him. And they asked him where the asylum was. And he replied, "Halibalum! Wormy speaky only!" So they had to find a worm that could speak English. His name was Dobby. And he translated for them. After much talking and confusion, they found out through the worm network, that Theresa Von Burglareo was in the Asylum that was 5 streets away from them.

Bobby and Dobby crawled onto Federico's back, and so did Timmy. And they began slithering all the way.

On the street, however, they met up with Jake, an angry pitbull. The pitbull was very hungry. He tried to eat Dobby, the only translator know to wormkind. However, Federico, the brave python strangled Jake. But in the process, was killed. "What shall we do?" asked Timmy.

Bobby smiled. "C'est la vie." Timmy didn't know that Bobby spoke French. He smiled back at Bobby.

After a little while, they found a cat named Ugaloo who offered them a ride. So, they animals all hopped onto his back and he took them to the asylum meandering on the streets and chasing insects whenever he saw them. Once they arrived, Ugaloo realized he was rather hungry, and in payment for they ride, he ate Timmy. After this delightful meal, Ugaloo, smiled at the worms, and just before he swallowed them as well they screeched out in French, "Save Theresa , she's in the asylum!" Fortunately, Ugaloo was a French cat. So he understood. And he began thinking. Cogitating. Meditating. Pondering. Ruminating. Very deeply. Until he fell asleep.

And, being a cat, he slept for hours... while poor Theresa was suffering.

Ugaloo woke up. "Ugh," he sighed. "Worms and tarantula meat is always giving me stomach aches," he whined. He thought about what their dying words were... "Epargner Theresa ! Save Theresa! elle est dans l'asile! She's in the asylum!" The words repeated endlessly in his mind... Those words... That tormented. "Should I risk my precious fur over that ?" he asked himself.

But, suddenly, Ugaloo's stomach ache got worse. It felt like the worms were still alive and were eating their way through his stomach lining! He groaned: "Auaghahgughalk!" And, thinking he'd better get to a surgeon to get the worms out before they killed him, he limped painful to the vet.

"My dear fellow," exclaimed Ugaloo's English vet. "Your full of worms and have a livetarantula crawling in your stomach!" he cried. "Oopaladoo!" said Ugaloo. "Can you get them out?---We're... trying to save Theresa Von Burglareo!" he stammered.

"Save Theresa?" he asked. "I'm the one who insisted on her going to asylum!"

To be continued...